If I could give you one gift it would be to see yourself through my eyes and then you would see how special you really are.

Friday, 5 July 2013

It's all in a name, or is it

This morning my husband shared with me the This Morning children's name debate "starring" Katie Hopkins of The Apprentice fame.


I am sure that most of you would have been as shocked as I was by the ignorance of this supposedly educated woman. However, whilest travelling down the road of adoption the issue of names has reared it's, possibly, ugly head. If you look at the Be My Parent website you can view a number of children looking to be adopted. I am sure that  KH would not consider spending time with many of them as they have names like Courtney, Amirha, Leevi, Trey, Aston, Daryce and Tyler.

We do/did have a concern about number 4s name, would it fit in with our family? On the other hand names are important to us as they are part of who we are and where we come from. If we chose to change our number 4's name are we not taking something away from them or denying them part of their heritage? As this child grows up will he/she feel that we were rejecting his/her birth parents or history. Their birth parents chose that name for a reason so if we do have the opportunity to meet the birth parents I think that it would be a good idea to ask them why that name? Is it a family name or does it have a special meaning?

Occasionally, adopted children's names are changed, usually only to protect them. The general advice is for them to keep their name, after all it is theirs. I think we are lucky because children invariably have ways of resolving these things, if our number 4's name is too outlandish or odd in our eyes, one of our 3 will shorten it or re-invent it keeping the heritage and history but adding a twist of our own making it fit with us.

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