If I could give you one gift it would be to see yourself through my eyes and then you would see how special you really are.

Monday, 15 July 2013

How many emotions in one week?

This time last week I was stressing whilst listing all the jobs around the house I had to do before two social workers visited, one of whom was visiting on behalf of a potential adoptee the other was our social workers team leader because our wonderful lady was on holiday. I rewrote the list four times knowing that I had to prioritise which floors I could wash as they were arriving at 11am aaah!

This was followed by the emotional exhaustion of having been on display, trying to show what wonderful parents we could be if given the chance. Then having to wait for judgement by a lady who has only met us for three or maybe four hours (she would have seen our humongous prospective adopters report though)

On Thursday I was dropping my mum home after our fitball class, I had literally pulled up outside her house when my phone rang - an unknown number- the hairs on the back of my neck prickled. Was this the call? Laying my hand on my mums arm (my mum was with me through the labours of my three birth children) to stop her from leaving the car. I was told that they wished "to proceed", congratulations were given and the ok to tell child 1,2 &3. My mum who had watched my three come in to the world was there to when the approval of number 4 was given. Silent tears tracked down my cheeks, I really couldn't believe what had happened.

Then there was the decision to be made as to when to tell the children and family and friends, we decided to wait, hard going I know but the priority had to be the children. Oh the emotions on Friday, the worry, the happiness, the excitement. Hearts pounding, tears streaming, laughter and raised voices.

The hugs, congratulations and more tears from family and friends as the children spread the good news.

Now we have the practical preparations to make but I can make them, smiling quietly to myself because a little tow-headed boy now fills my thoughts and dreams of the future. I can see him running in the garden, learning to ride  a bike with his big brother, blow bubbles with his big sister and be read to by his bigger sister. I am not foolish enough to think that life will be perfect but I know that it will be good.

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