If I could give you one gift it would be to see yourself through my eyes and then you would see how special you really are.

Monday, 17 March 2014


I listened to a radio discussion on radio 3 this week about Asperger's syndrome and men by the time it had finished I wondered if we were doing men a disservice. According to the discussion some women felt that their husbands had to have a disorder if they weren't very good at mixing at a party, couldn't be empathetic or romantic. Firstly, if they didn't like their husbands as they were why marry them in the first place and secondly with disorders like Asperger's being  diagnosed more and more it made me wonder if in some cases the diagnosis is a way of just explaining the differences between men and women.

I am really anti labelling anyone, particularly children, with any type of disorder as I feel that it can either become a self-fulfilling prophecy or just be used to excuse behaviours that people don't like rather than try and deal with them. I am not a doctor or in anyway medically trained so would not argue that disorders such as ADHD, autism or Asperger's don't exist but I do feel that the minute a child does not quite fit into what society dictates as normal they have to be diagnosed with some sort of disorder.  ADHD for example is thought to be hereditary, as child 4's birth father thought that he suffered from it there is a possibility that our son will also suffer some of its symptoms, in fact if you read the NHS list of symptoms he already shows some,  but then so do a lot of toddlers, particularly curious and adventurous little boys. We have known since he first arrived that we will need to channel his exuberance into team sports, such as rugby, that forest school and scouting where he can learn to light fires and use knives and saws safely will be a must once he is old enough. He needs activities that keep him interested, but preferably out of trouble. He is one of those children that needs an eye kept on him otherwise his curiosity and exploration inevitably lead him into mischief.

The main symptoms are:
  • a short attention span
  • being easily distracted
  • making careless mistakes, for example in schoolwork 
  • appearing forgetful or losing things 
  • being unable to stick at tasks that are tedious or time consuming
  • being unable to listen to or carry out instructions
  • being unable to concentrate
  • constantly changing activity or task
  • having difficulty organising tasks


The main symptoms of hyperactivity are:
  • being unable to sit still, especially in calm or quiet surroundings
  • constantly fidgeting
  • being unable to settle to tasks
  • excessive physical movement
  • excessive talking


The main symptoms of impulsiveness are:
  • being unable to wait for a turn
  • acting without thinking
  • interrupting conversations
  • little or no sense of danger
I shared this with the family to which all of them could relate to any number of the symptoms, so this list caused a fair bit of hilarity. In all seriousness for those that do suffer severe ADHD life must be very difficult but perhaps we as society should learn to embrace them.

No comments:

Post a Comment